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Capt.'s Column // Internet Reality Check Boundaries, Blocking & the Law Back to The Epic Gazette

Capt.'s Column // Internet Reality Check By Capt. // Epic App Solutions

Someone's Bothering You? Block Them.

Folks, we've had ways to screen, reject and block unwanted communication for decades. The technology changed. The basic boundary did not.

Content Notice

This article contains strong language.

The Simple Version

Tell them to leave you alone. Block them. Document what happens next.

This Really Isn't That Fucking Complicated.

Someone keeps bothering you on Facebook? Block them.

Instagram? Block them.

Email? Filter or block them.

Text message? Block them.

Chat app? Block them.

Phone? Block the number.

The Internet did not magically eliminate the concept of personal boundaries.

YOU ARE ALLOWED TO SAY “LEAVE ME ALONE.”

But Here's Where People Get Confused.

Blocking someone is a practical tool. It is not some universal legal prerequisite you have to complete before unwanted conduct can become harassment, stalking or a threat.

And replying to somebody does not automatically mean: “Congratulations, you consented to being harassed forever.”

That's nonsense too.

People respond for all kinds of reasons. They may be trying to resolve a disagreement, tell someone to stop, conduct business, correct misinformation or simply figure out what the hell is happening.

Wrong

“If you didn't block them, you must enjoy the harassment.”

Better

“If you want no further contact, clearly establish the boundary and stop feeding the conversation.”

Here's the Grown-Up Version.

1. Establish the boundary. If it's safe and appropriate, make it painfully clear: “Do not contact me again.”

2. Block the obvious channels. Phone, social media, chat, email or whatever communication method is causing the problem.

3. Save the evidence. Screenshots, dates, messages, usernames, email addresses, voicemail, caller information and attempts to contact you through other accounts.

4. Watch what happens next. Did they respect the boundary? Great. Problem solved.

5. If they keep going around it, document that too. New accounts, new numbers, alternate emails, third-party messages or repeated contact may become important when showing a continuing pattern.

The Part Internet Warriors Seem to Love.

They block somebody on Facebook.

Then unblock them to see what they're saying.

Then screenshot it.

Then reply.

Then argue for three hours.

Then announce: “THIS PERSON WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE.”

Buddy. At some point you have to stop reopening the fucking door.

That does not excuse genuinely threatening or harassing behavior. It means boundaries work better when you actually maintain them.

Important Exception — Threats and immediate danger are different.
If someone threatens violence, appears at your home or workplace, stalks or follows you, threatens your family, or makes you reasonably fear for your safety, you do not need to play a game of “warn, block, wait and see” before seeking help. Preserve the evidence and contact law enforcement or emergency services when appropriate.

And Yes — The Internet Counts.

California law specifically recognizes telephone calls and electronic communications when dealing with certain forms of repeated harassing contact.

California Penal Code §653m, for example, addresses repeated telephone calls or electronic contact made with intent to annoy or harass, subject to important exceptions for good-faith and ordinary business communications.

California's stalking statute, Penal Code §646.9, can also include electronic communications as part of a repeated course of conduct when the additional legal requirements for stalking are present.

In other words: being online does not place everybody in some magical lawless dimension.

Keep The Legal Claim Straight

Not every annoying message is criminal harassment.

A disagreement is not automatically harassment.
Criticism is not automatically harassment.
Someone replying to your public post is not automatically stalking you.
Repeated unwanted contact can become much more serious depending on intent, frequency, threats and the overall course of conduct.
A person does not have to wait for repeated contact if there is an immediate threat or safety concern.

BOUNDARIES AREN'T COMPLICATED. PEOPLE MAKE THEM COMPLICATED.

So Here's the Capt. Version.

Someone is annoying you and you genuinely want nothing to do with them?

Tell them once, when appropriate: “Leave me alone. Do not contact me again.”

Then block them.

Don't stalk their page afterward. Don't send your friends over there. Don't unblock them every Tuesday because you're curious. Don't create another account so you can keep arguing.

Actually disengage.

If they respect it, fantastic. Everybody gets on with life.

If they deliberately keep finding ways around that boundary, save the evidence.

If it becomes repeated harassment, stalking, threatening conduct or a legitimate safety issue, then you have something much more useful than an Internet screaming match:

a documented pattern.

TELL THEM. BLOCK THEM. DOCUMENT IT. THEN GO LIVE YOUR FUCKING LIFE.

The block button isn't cowardice. Sometimes it's just the digital equivalent of closing the front door.

And contrary to what social media has apparently taught half the population, you are not required to stand there with the door open arguing with somebody for the next six months.

Editorial note: This article provides general information and commentary on online boundaries and general principles of harassment and stalking law. It is not legal advice. Laws and remedies depend on the facts, jurisdiction and nature of the conduct involved.

Tell Them. Block Them. Document It.

A boundary only works if you actually hold it. Say it once, block the channel, keep the evidence, and get back to your life.

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